Welcome to TalkRx with Doctor Neha from Bali. I am so thrilled to be spending a long time in Bali and filming from here. One of the questions that keeps coming up in various forms is, “How do I know if I can trust someone else—trust a new place, trust a new boss, trust my partner after they’ve betrayed me?” It got me thinking about this word trust. How is it that you know whether you can trust someone else or some other place? I thought it was a perfect topic considering I’m in a brand new place, Bali.
As I started to look around and pay attention to my body’s signals, I realized I felt like I could trust the people here, the Indonesian people and this place. I started to get curious about how I knew that. Inside my body, the way it shows up is in my throat—which can sometimes become constricted when I’m stressed. My throat was open and relaxed. I could breathe slowly and deeply, and my chest expanded easily. I also felt myself relaxing and feeling like, “Okay they’ve got me.”
The environment here really lends itself to me: from the Ayurvedic nature of the food and the organic way that things are prepared so beautifully. Even in a coconut used for a drinking vessel, someone carefully cut out a star in the top of it and created a straw from a papaya stem. I noticed I was resonating with the environmental nature of being here.
I also noticed the marigolds, which reminds me of any Indian wedding and India. There’s also the incense, the warm weather, the tropical nature, and the spirituality everywhere. People are always putting out flowers and little spiritual offerings. Those external cues taught me that the environment I was in felt safe.
The interesting piece is that right when I came out from the airport, someone had told me to make sure I get a SIM card for my phone so I don’t get charged too much money while I’m here. A man approached me and offered to give me this one month SIM card for my phone for 450,000 rupiahs, which is about $40 American for this “amazing” amount of data and 80 minutes of phone calls. But only two weeks into my trip, the card expired. (Note to self: Don’t buy anything at airports.) The two lessons I learned were 1) I can trust myself by paying attention to my environment and seeing if somebody’s energy and the way that they communicate with me indicates they are someone I can trust and 2) when I’m afraid, I sometimes give up my trust to somebody who I think knows more than me.
For you to figure out trust, ask yourself, “Do I ever give up my knowledge or question something because I think another person must know more than I do?” I felt nervous to ask the man at the airport to give me a new SIM card out of a brand new package. He just pulled out the SIM card, and I wondered, How come it wasn’t wrapped? I got taken for a ride and had to get another SIM card—and now it’s fine. I think of it as the cost of me learning to use that little voice of intuition and knowing. When I know something’s a little off, I need to say something.
Another situation of trust here is that I have a driver because I am not one to brave the world of the moped in Bali. It’s unbelievable the way the traffic runs. It’s almost like a school of fish going through water. Everybody just kind of moves around each other to make room. I asked this man who drove me to a few places, “Noman, why is it in general the Balinese people are so kind and so gentle and so loving?” He said, “Well, that’s easy, Neha. Our culture believes in karma.” Karma is the idea that the actions and deeds that you do in the world will come back to you.
He said, “It’s very ingrained in our culture and that’s why people behave this way.” I thought, That’s amazing! I’m Indian, and I’ve heard of karma. In fact, my father’s first name is Karma. I saw what an important difference it makes in the world to believe that we’re all connected. That what I do and how I treat another human being is also how I will be treated.
I’ll tell you my takeaway: I need to listen to my intuition. In general, the vast majority of people here in Bali were completely respectful and amazing.
How do I know I can trust the people of Bali? Because I trust myself.
The only way you know you can trust someone else or something else is directly related to how much you trust yourself to navigate unexpected happenings. Do you trust that you can speak up? Do you trust that you’ll say something if an agreement wasn’t kept? Do you trust that inner guidance that says, “Something’s wrong. That was weird.” Do you speak up, or do you stay quiet?
I stayed quiet in that incident about the SIM card, and I should have asked a question. I should have said, “Can I please have a new SIM card that’s unopened?”
I look forward to making many videos about the special experiences that I’m having here and sharing them with you. Until next time, if you’d like to send me your communication question, drop me a tweet at #AskDoctorNeha.
Pay attention to your body’s signals.
When you notice physical discomfort, pause and breathe deeply.
In that moment, get curious and listen to your intuition. Ask yourself, “What is my body trying to tell me?”
When something feels off, speak up. If you need clarity, ask a question. If you need more time, say, “Something feels off here, I’ll get back to you.”
Trust in your senses and the wisdom of your body. They’re here to help you.
I trust you.